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Two and a Half Men

Two and a Half Men

Genre: Sitcom

Chiropractor and single father Alan Harper lives in a beachfront house with divorced Internet billionaire Walden Schmidt, who bought the house following the untimely death of Alan's brother, Charlie. As they acclimate to their living arrangement, the tightly wound Alan finds himself taking on a mentor role with Walden, whose lifelong dependence on being taken care of has left him a bit naive. Despite his unsuccessful romantic history, Alan also tries to help Walden overcome his limited experiences with dating. Berta, a sharp-tongued, unapologetic housekeeper, is also featured in the series.
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    Avg. 2.5 (12,263 ratings)
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All Upcoming Times for Two and a Half Men

Episode Air Date Channel

Camel Filters and Pheremones

S01, E12  (First Aired: Jan. 5, 2004)
The housekeeper's beautiful granddaughter comes to work with her and attracts the attention of the men; Alan tries to convince Judith that Charlie's house is good for Jake.
  • Sun 8/28
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Sarah Like Puny Alan

S01, E13  (First Aired: Jan. 12, 2004)
Charlie sets his ailing brother up on a date, then drags him to a steam room to help him get rid of his flu symptoms.
  • Sun 8/28
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead

S08, E12  (First Aired: Dec. 13, 2010)
Depressed after his breakup from Courtney (Jenny McCarthy), Charlie goes to see his psychiatrist (Jane Lynch).
  • Mon 8/29
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Skunk, Dog Crap and Ketchup

S08, E13  (First Aired: Jan. 3, 2011)
Alan feels paranoid when Lyndsey becomes friendly with Charlie.
  • Mon 8/29
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Looking' for Japanese Subs

S08, E14  (First Aired: Jan. 17, 2011)
Charlie begins stalking Rose (Melanie Lynskey); Alan becomes concerned when Eldridge and Jake begin videotaping dangerous stunts.
  • Tue 8/30
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak

S08, E15  (First Aired: Feb. 7, 2011)
Charlie and Rose continue their affair; Alan's business becomes a Ponzi scheme.
  • Tue 8/30
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

That Darn Priest

S08, E16  (First Aired: Feb. 14, 2011)
Rose discovers Alan's Ponzi scheme; Alan meets Rose's ``husband''; Charlie tries to get time alone with Rose.
  • Wed 8/31
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Pilot

S01, E01  (First Aired: Sep. 22, 2003)
Charlie's life turns upside down when his brother and nephew move in; at the supermarket, Charlie discovers he can use 10-year-old Jake to attract women.
  • Wed 8/31
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Big Flappy Bastards

S01, E02  (First Aired: Sep. 29, 2003)
Charlie doesn't know how to discipline Jake for luring a flock of sea gulls into his room; Judith surprises Alan when he goes home to fix her sprinklers.
  • Thu 9/1
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Of Course He's Dead -- Part One

S12, E15  (First Aired: Feb. 19, 2015)
Details regarding Charlie Harper are revealed.
  • Thu 9/1
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell

S01, E03  (First Aired: Oct. 6, 2003)
One drink too many emboldens the brothers to stand up to their controlling mother.
  • Fri 9/2
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Of Course He's Dead -- Part Two

S12, E16  (First Aired: Feb. 19, 2015)
Details regarding Charlie Harper are revealed.
  • Fri 9/2
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh

S05, E12  (First Aired: Mar. 24, 2008)
Rose comes back from England and takes care of sick Charlie in a very strange way.
  • Sun 9/4
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

The Soil Is Moist

S05, E13  (First Aired: Mar. 31, 2008)
Alan's date, who happens to be a friend of his ex, reveals a secret about Judith's sex life.
  • Sun 9/4
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap

S01, E04  (First Aired: Oct. 13, 2003)
Alan offers to help get Charlie's cleaning lady back if Charlie can get Jake ready to go out to dinner with his mother.
  • Mon 9/5
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up With a Hump

S01, E05  (First Aired: Oct. 20, 2003)
Charlie and Alan meet several women while attending one of Jake's soccer games.
  • Mon 9/5
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

No Episode Title

(First Aired: Sep. 22, 2003)
The social interactions of a group of misfits, including a divorcee and an Internet billionaire.
  • Mon 9/5
  • 7:00PM-7:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT
  •  
  • 7:30PM-8:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Did You Check With the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?

S01, E06  (First Aired: Oct. 27, 2003)
After Evelyn's new beau dumps her, Charlie and Alan enlist Jake to cheer her up; Charlie teaches Jake a lesson about screening telephone calls from women.
  • Tue 9/6
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake

S01, E07  (First Aired: Nov. 3, 2003)
For a school assignment, Jake draws the tattooed buttocks of Charlie's female friend.
  • Tue 9/6
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

No Episode Title

(First Aired: Sep. 22, 2003)
The social interactions of a group of misfits, including a divorcee and an Internet billionaire.
  • Tue 9/6
  • 7:00PM-7:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT
  •  
  • 7:30PM-8:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful

S01, E08  (First Aired: Nov. 10, 2003)
Charlie realizes Jake's classmates know the words to all of his jingles, and he is inspired to craft the fourth-grade musical with unusual results.
  • Wed 9/7
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

S09, E01  (First Aired: Sep. 19, 2011)
After saying goodbye to the late Charlie Harper, Alan meets Walden Schmidt (Ashton Kutcher), a broken-hearted billionaire.
  • Wed 9/7
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Phase One, Complete

S01, E09  (First Aired: Nov. 17, 2003)
Jake and Evelyn befriend one of Charlie's one-night stands, causing her to stay longer than expected.
  • Thu 9/8
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

People Who Love Peepholes

S09, E02  (First Aired: Sep. 26, 2011)
Walden's ex-wife, Bridget (Judy Greer), turns up.
  • Thu 9/8
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

S01, E11  (First Aired: Dec. 15, 2003)
Alan reluctantly agrees to a makeover after running into his ex-wife and her new beau; when the brothers go shopping, they clash over what to buy.
  • Fri 9/9
  • 6:00PM-6:30PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT

Big Girls Don't Throw Food

S09, E03  (First Aired: Oct. 3, 2011)
Alan helps Walden get ready for a date with Bridget (Judy Greer); Jake decides to drop out of school like Walden did.
  • Fri 9/9
  • 6:30PM-7:00PM
  • 9.1
  • WGNDT